Monday, September 12, 2011

How can I not love Allah ??

Wallazina Aamanu Ashaddu Hubban Lillah
Those who are believer loves Allah most intensly (Surah Baqarah 165)

This is what I read few minutes back ,melted my heart so thought to share ,A letter written by a lover of Allah about his love for Allah Ta'ala mashaAllah !
How can I not love Allah? the day I read in the Quran......wallazina aamanu ashaddu hubban lillah.....I came to know for the first time in my life that Allah can (and should) be loved!!! To me it was a strange revelation.I can still recall the moments of surprise as I sat wide eyed and totally spell bound listening to you dearest Ustazah that man loves perfection and so he can not love anyone more than Allah because Allah is the most perfect being the ONLY perfect being ,no other person or thing can satisfy human being's urge to find perfection and perfect reciprocation from his beloved..... 
It might be my intense craving for love that made me want to learn to love Allah. All my life I had thought that the need to love and to be loved was my one and only "worldly desire".......but I was such an idealist,the few friends I made over the years were lovable in my eyes for their intelligence and for their wit and humour and love for language but eventually I found that their knowledge and thinking was not complete,they refused to have that blind faith in Islam which I had even while I was ignorant about it and consequently did not practise it but I knew one thing that Islam must be the only acceptable way of life and Quran must be the most perfect book.......
So when I discovered this treasure in the 36th year of my life I was at a stage where all my previous loves were incomplete in my eyes and I was totally depressed and dissatisfied with life because I felt there must be something more to life than just going through the same round of activities day after day after day,So you can imagine how the rain of Quran drenched my thirsty heart.I thought I had found my beloved,my perfect ideal but reaching the Ayat I mentioned above,  I realised that I had no idea of who Allah is.I had never even thought of loving Him,so how was I going to enter into His list of Momins? That day I started to ask for His love.I started to think on these lines.I visualised How His love must feel like.I was in my quest for a lot of answers that I needed but there was no one to give me those answers,when one day the class incharge announced that the next casstte of the tafseer was not available due to some reason,so instead we will listen to another cassette titled "zikr-e-Ilahi" by dr. Ghulam Murtaza,my nafs complained....oh no I don't want to listen to anyone else and I want to just do the lesson,maybe now someone will start telling us how we should read wazeefas.I had such a limited concept of "zikr", how ignorant I was!!!!!. Convents teach us to look down on all rituals and also the people who are following those rituals but they teach us to be outwardly composed and "well-mannered" And so I kept sitting in my place forcing myself to listen.I had no idea at that time that I was about to listen to one of the most valuable, most enjoyable lesson of my life,Although I loved it from beginning to end and savoured every word of it,yet the most amazing thing which he said was that Allah's love is not a dull or dry thing,you can feel it like you enter an airconditioned room and feel the chill in the air,no one needs to tell you that the AC is on,you can feel it,so Allah's love can also be felt !!!! 
I was astounded,here were answers to all my questions ,the way he explained Taqwa and strength of faith and other things until finally at the end of the talk he said that Allah's love cannot be attained with any other thing except through the Quran and I was so full of joy because I already loved the Quran passionately so It gave me hope that very soon I will be able to love Allah too but with time and experience Allah showed me the various thinking "disabilities" in my heart were preventing me to really and truly appreciate Allah and really love Him But Alhamdulillah I never gave up,after every painful episode I would go back to my Quran and tried to comfort my wounded soul that at least I love His words so maybe He will forgive me.I was so ignorant I failed to see the most obvious thing that It was Allah himself who had put that love of Quran in my heart.....
It was when I started writing my reviews for the Quran after I had completed the course, that I realised this fact and everytime I completed a review, I would be filled with true gratitude and appreciation for Allah for enabling me to write.....
And today sitting in front of Ustazah,attending my first ever live lecture from her.and reading about Allah's love, from the book " minhajul Qasidin"  by Imam Abdurrahman ibnul Jawzi.I felt the cool breeze enter my heart.
even in the scorching heat on my way back home,I felt like Allah was looking at me and telling me that this is why I made you crazy for love,to love me ,to be a true momin,so even though the heart is in constant danger of pollusion and negetive attacks of the shaitan and the nafs.I am glad that I experienced those few moments in which I could really feel my heart full of love for Allah.Alhamdulillah




2 comments:

  1. Salam.. :)
    hey i really love this story of yours! so wonderful!
    i feel the same too..
    "you can feel it like you enter an airconditioned room and feel the chill in the air"
    i truly agree with this statement!
    wish my love towards Him is endless, Amin.
    i wanna ask for ur permission if i can share this story :) i will make a copy but credit to this page. can i? Jazakallahu khairan.

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    1. Walaikum Assalam smile

      Sorry for being late in reply.
      JazakAllah for taking out time to read this story.It would be my pleasure if you would spread the Love of Allah Ta'ala. smile.

      Remember me in your Duaas.
      JazakAllah

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